Awkward...

Throughout Waiting for the Barbarians there is an odd sexual tension. The magistrate himself is just generally an awkward man, with creepy lustful thoughts. His relationship with the blind slave-girl is full of unanswered sexual tension. She even attempts to come on to the magistrate but nothing comes of her efforts. The sexual tension is more or less put to rest when the girl and the magistrate are finally together on their way to bring her home, but still there lingers a weird sexual vibe throughout the book. The lack of specific names of people or groups in the book gives more emphasis on the actions in the book and aside from the brutal torture and imagery, the theme of awkward sexual tension prevails.

Articles

"Conrad's Ethics and the Margins of Apocalypse Now" by Louis Grieff

• Despite the many violations of the novel's shape and substance, Coppola manages to pay homage to Conrad's work in unexpected ways.

1. There is a "creative imitation of the Conradian frame" in the form of a disembodied voice at the beginning and end of the film.
2. In contrast to the book, the film portrays Kurtz as a solid, dedicated man while Captain Willard(Marlow) is more fragmented and corrupt. Neither major character in the film can be seen as a good example of Conradian ethics in the Heart of Darkness.
3. Coppola uses 4 minor characters--Chief, Chef, Lance, and Kilgore--with largely un-Conradian names to depict the conflict of "good craftsman and hollow man" as it is in the Heart of Darkness between the two main characters.
4. Chef and Chief give the perfect combination to depict Marlow's ethical craftmanship of discipline mixed with imaginative artistry.
5. Though Lance and Kilgor are outward opposites, they are equally as hollow and empty on the inside. 
   

"'To Boldly Go': Heart of Darkness and Popular Culture" by Linda J. Dryden

• The main idea of The Heart of Darkness and the ethical issues within have been reused and reiterated through popular culture over the last hundred years.

1. Apocalypse Now obviously uses the book to convey the same message about US involvement in Vietnam that Conrad was about imperialism in Africa. The popularity of the movie actually boosted the meaning and popularity of the book, and the depth of Conrad's words made a much more meaningful movie.
2. The television show the Simpsons even has an episode named "The Bart of Darkness" and another that references the novel The Lord of the Flies, which in fact owes part of its influence to... yupp you guessed it, the Heart of Darkness.
3. The influence present in the television show Star Trek is much more subtle than that in the Simpsons, but it is also more common. Throughout the series a main topic, just as in Heart of Darkness, is the question of what it means to be human. Star Trek uses aliens to discuss the moral issues and dilemmas present in the novel, and bits and pieces of the plots even correspond with the novel. 
4. Long story short, Conrad's Heart of Darkness has not only influenced much of out pop culture, it has become a "part of our heritage".

Not So Different After All

Up to this point in The Heart of Darkness the natives are considered to be "savages". They are uncivilized cannibals that need to be taught and controlled by the white men who have come to save them. Yet, in section two we see a slight change in this view. Marlow even comments on the "suspicion of their not being inhuman". It is a new idea to him that perhaps these people are reasonable, even possibly more so than the white men. The conspiring Marlow witnesses and the stories of Kurtz's actions throughout his voyage lift up the rug on the true character of the white men and make the contrasting natives seem more civilized. Marlow isolates himself from the white members of his crew and begins to get better acquainted with his native crewmembers. He even notes that his fireman, a native, is basically the same as a poorly educated white man doing the same job. Even when told bluntly that the cannibals want to eat the people in the fog, Marlow's reaction is one of understanding. He knows that they did not have much food, so he seems to understand their desire to eat people. It is clear to me at this point that the devils Marlow will continue to encounter on his journey are largely the white men around him, but can we see signs that there will be native devils encountered? If not, will Marlow continue to get closer to the natives and maybe even become more like them? His friendship with the African helmsman resulted in Marlow throwing away his shoes, is this in some way symbolic or is Marlow just melodramatic? 

More Fun This Way

The Sound and the Fury is certainly a difficult novel to understand. Lawrence Bowling's article gives a view into the debate as to whether or not the difficulty is a necessary one. Could Faulkner's writing be just as moving and get the same point across to the reader had he written it in a more normal fashion? In my opinion, no it could not. First, much of what the reader gets out of the book is through the reactions of the different characters. These reactions are only seen the way they are by the individual narrator at any given time. A different narrator may very well have seen the scene in a completely different way. The cynicism of Jason, depression and confusion of Quentin, and the innocence and lack of intellect of Benjy all contribute to their narrations. Each give a different view of individual actions and of life, and Faulker depicts them all perfectly through the eyes of the characters. In fact, Faulkner often gives us examples of this occurrence and lets the reader piece it all together. Furthermore, the piecing together of events is a large part that makes this book such a fun one to read and analyze. To be honest, I probably would not have read it outside of class, and if I had I would certainly not have gotten as much out of it as I did through our group analysis, but I definitely enjoyed the work. 

• Faulkner: Technique of "The Sound and the Fury"

• Lawrence Edward Bowling
• The Kenyon Review, Vol. 10, No. 4 (Autumn, 1948), pp. 552-566
• Published by: Kenyon College

Inner Dialogue?

The end of part two left me pretty dazed and confused. At first, the section with no punctuation reminded me, unfortunately, of Beloved. The first time I read the passage, I thought Quentin was using lower case "i" to show his low self worth. I considered it a representation of his suicidal tendencies, but when I read it a second time I realized the conversation taking place. Once again, Quentin's thoughts return to the idea of incest and his love for Caddy. The "he", to me, refers to his father. In the scene Quentin is reflecting on a conversation he had with his father about Caddy, the past, and the future. However, I still have a few questions about the passage.

What exactly did we learn about Quentin's relationship with "he"? For that matter, who exactly is he? Lastly, why is Quentin reflecting on this now?

No Redemption in Sight

John Cheever’s The Five-Forty-Eight is a chilling story that shows the unwillingness of man to change despite imminent danger and despite irreversible damage done to others. The main character, Blake, has spent years using and abusing the people around him with no real regard for their feelings. Inevitably, he finds himself in a position to change his ways and to apologize for at least one of the terrible things he has done, but fails to see the error of his conduct. When faced with someone he has hurt, Blake only thinks of himself, and when faced with death, he only thinks of the things he will miss.

Blake finds no harm in the way he treated Ms. Dent, so when she confronts him he makes no effort to redress or rectify what has happened. In fact, Blake is so unmoved by his actions that he manages to kick Ms. Dent while she is down when he ignores her at his office. It is clear that this is not the first time Blake has done something like this. He had encounters similar to this with “many women…picked for their lack of self-esteem” and had never cared for any of them.(505) When Blake does finally see Ms. Dent after their night in her apartment, she begins to weep as she had before. Once again, Blake notices her weeping, but does nothing. He does not even attempt to show signs of sympathy for her situation or regret for what he has done to her. The regret he does feel, however, is for not realizing she was crazy. At no point does the effect of his actions run through his head, instead his thoughts consist only of how he could have avoided seeing her on that day or avoided being with her before. To Blake, his error came not in his selfish and demeaning actions towards Ms. Dent or anyone else in his life, but instead in his lack of discernment in choosing the insane assistant as his vice.

Blake may well have been able to escape his moving prison while on the train with Ms. Dent had he not severed ties with all the people he knew, yet he still never repents or changes in any way. Both Mr. Watkins and Mrs. Compton were in a position to help Blake in his predicament, but because of the way he treats his wife and because of his arrogance when dealing with Mr. Watkins, he is left to his own seemingly imminent demise. Even when Blake is standing directly next to them, “neither of them spoke to him,” or when he is in the rain “none of them offered to give him a ride.”(511) Finally, after years of treating his wife irrationally, years of false egotism, and years of treating women he had relations with rudely, Blake is forced to face all of his mistakes at once. Yet, he does not know that is what has happened. When he begins to weep, it is not for regret of his actions, but for fear of death itself.

Anais Nin once said, “people living deeply have no fear of death” but Blake is not living deeply, a fact that he himself fails to realize. His whole life is on the surface, as shallow as his taste in women. His evaluations of people are short and judgmental and he a controlling user, which is why Ms. Dent’s actions fail to change Blake. Life went on before his episode with her, and it will either go on the same way after the episode, or it won’t at all. When all is said and done, Blake “picked up his hat from the ground where it had fallen and walked home”(512) showing that nothing had changed. It was just a weird day for Blake but now that it was over he could begin his walk home as he did every day before.

1/2 Blog

I have read only a couple short stories, but i have managed to find ones that I have greatly enjoyed. The one i have enjoyed the most is Light Sweet Crude by Christopher Feliciano Arnold. It won the Playboy College Fiction Contest in 2009 and was published in the October issue. It follows an oil contract trader and is an exciting depiction of the behind-the-scenes oil industry. I also enjoyed reading In His Own Woods by Scott Turow. It is about a man's dream to own land and the adventures he finally has in his own woods with his daughter. I have not had much time to read other stories since i have been busy making up missed work, but I am excited to read more and see what others I can find.

Rebirth or Final Destination?

In my eyes, Bobbie Ann Mason's short story "Shiloh" has a cliffhanger for an end that leaves the reader wondering weather Norma Jean has given herself another chance at life, or has simply ended it all together. It is clear that the life she had with her husband is over, but where does it go from there? The last scene we see is Norma Jean on a cliff by the river and we are not sure what she is doing with her arms. To me, it would make sense in the story for her to be ending her life. Where else does she have to go after she just ended her marriage that has been the basis for her life since high school? The story does not mention anything about a college education, she has already had a child that died, leaving her broken and scarred, and despite her gung-ho attitude she seems to have little going for her. She herself says that she "can't deal" with everything that is going on, so it would not be farfetched for her to end her life. To me, the tragedy of losing her child never really hit Norma Jean. Obviously she was unable to completely ignore it, but with her husband gone for long periods of time, she was easily able to put it to the back of her mind. Even when he was at home, they never really discussed it. But with him home for a long period of time, it pushed the issue to the front of her mind. She was unhappy with his inability to get back on his feet but most of all she was confronted head on by the ugly past that they had. The child, to me, seems to be the only reason they had gotten married right out of high school. An unexpected pregnancy is no way to start a healthy marriage, so instead they started a life of mediocrity and Norma Jean was always unhappy with that deep down. It would also be a plausible scenario for her to simply leave her husband and start her life anew. Start where she left off just years behind the rest of the pack. She could finally get out from under the scrutinizing eyes of her mother, and finally move past her dead child and failed marriage. Recently, she had already began the rebuilding process with her writing and exercising classes. She could go back to school, divorce her husband, and start life anew, the way she always dreamt it would be. To be honest at the risk of being too cheesy, Norma Jean has an opportunity to do whatever she wants. She has no children, and now no husband to tie her down. Yet, as the story comes to a close, I cannot help but think that she disagrees with my evaluation of her situation. It is clear that her dead child still bothers her, and her life is a huge disappointment to her. Both death and rebirth are plausible options, yet I tend to lean towards the death. I fail to see the option of rebirth when she is hours from home with the man she just left, she is broken by her years of unhappiness, and she is on a cliff alone waving her arms.

A Bit Much

In the story A&P by John Updike, the girls come into the story scantily clad, and are chastised for doing so, yet I feel more and more in this world we are becoming okay with less and less clothing. This is of course evident through all parts of life. Celebrities, fashion, even just general dress has become more and more about covering less and less. Usually, I am fine with this fact. Let's be honest, I am a seventeen year old boy. I am still, however, a person who believes there is a time for all of that but there should still be time to put clothes on and be civilized. Clearly, walking into a grocery store without shoes is both improper and pretty gross in general. This fact really struck home today when I went to church. I am still pretty young, but even I remember the days of getting dressed up to go to church. When my grandmother was a young girl it was the time everyone dressed up to look their best for the rest of their friends at church and just to look nice in general. But today when I walked in feeling pretty casual myself in jeans and a long-sleeve collared shirt rolled up I found a large percentage of the people around me dressed in t-shirts and shorts. Now, this is Arizona and there is such a thing as West Coast casualness but this is taking it way to far. When I look around and see every girl in short jean shorts a tank top and flip-flops I can't help but think that something is wrong. 

The store manager clearly agrees with me, seeing as he chastises the girls, but his words are both lost on and unimportant to the girls and everyone else around. As I said before, I usually do not mind our societies infatuation with bare skin, but when it is at church or in a place that demands certain clothes, such as at a supermarket where it would be easy to spread sickness or disease, I think it only respectful to oblige. How can you expect anyone to respect you if you show up to church, CHURCH, in a miniskirt and a v-neck? That's outrageous. I get that just going is better than a lot of people, just as the girls in the story at least pay for what they are getting, but still it isn't that hard to put on jeans and a nice shirt, or in the case of the girls to put on some shoes. Why anyone would want to go into a supermarket in bare feet to begin with baffles me, that would be nasty who knows what's on that floor, but to go in without shoes or any clothes more than the equivalent of your underwear is just dirty in general. We have all seen the pictures of Lindsay Lohan or Britney Spears wearing no shoes in public restrooms and flashing the whole world, yet we are okay with that? I personally don't care what they do, but clearly it has set the stage for what has become an extraordinarily casual society that we live in and its getting to be a bit much for me. I am not saying that church, supermarkets, or anywhere else for that matter needs to mandate a certain dress code because I believe it is a free country and people should be able to wear what they want, I just also believe that there should be a certain level of self-respect and dignity maintained. Show what you want, but at the right times.

Over-Vilified and Under-Appreciated

It is easy to vilify Daisy in the short story Teenage Wasteland but I think she is far better of a person and a mother than she is given credit for. In class, we successfully tore Daisy apart for fifty minutes; she’s too insecure, she’s too lenient; she’s too much of a friend, etc. Yes, she was pretty unsuccessful in most of her attempts at helping and understanding Donny, but at least she tries. Can we really say the same for the other men and women in Donny’s life? A father who barely appears in the story at all, let alone Donny’s life, a tutor who is just as much of a teenager as Donny is, and a set of teachers who are not much help but instead enjoy scolding Daisy for her mistakes, it is no wonder Donny turns out the way he does when so few people around him truly care about his well-being.

            Donny’s principal and teachers are more than happy to point out the issues Donny is having and give suggestions to Daisy on how to handle it, yet there is no mention in the story of any of them giving her actual help. Daisy’s parenting is even blamed and questioned for his issue with alcohol at school. The fact that he was able to get drunk during school hours is not mentioned at all, just the issues he is having with his mother. The issues started at home, but there is still definitely ways for the school to keep him from drinking during school hours. I know I would never be able to at PCDS, there are too many rules in place and enforced for me to even really have the chance.

            Donny’s father, Matt, rarely shows up in the story, and when he does he really only interacts with Daisy. There is little to no interaction between father and son in the story, giving Donny a large void for a father figure. His mother can only do so much in the fathering department, and with really no support from her husband to fall back on she is left all alone to parent the troublesome youth. She does what she can at home; she sets restrictions on phone calls and television as well as going so far as to watch him do his homework. This is not to say Daisy’s actions are perfect because she does not really bother to help Donny with his homework, she just watches him and only after it is suggested to her, and she completely neglects the needs of her other child. She does, however, make an attempt. She is not the most prepared or suitable mother but she definitely cares for Donny and tries her hardest, which cannot be said as easily for his father.

            When Daisy does realize she is incapable of handling Donny on her own, the principal suggests she speak to Cal, a local tutor/counselor. It takes a lot of courage for a mother to admit she is not able of dealing with her children, let alone for her to ask someone to help out or take over. What Daisy did not realize, however, was that she was asking for help and entrusting her kid with someone as irresponsible as Donny. Daisy follows Cal’s lead thinking he knew better and could help; she even disregards teachers and shows misguided faith in Cal’s ability to aid her in her struggle. Cal’s house can best be described using the story’s title, a teenage wasteland. In class we spoke of how much Daisy wanted Donny to like her and insecure she was, but completely neglected the obvious fact that Cal is a Peter Pan- like figure that simply refused to grow up. He is able to justify to the parents and Daisy pretty much whatever the kids and Donny want to do just so they will like him. With incompetent help and misguided trust, Daisy is left as an unqualified mother trying to do right by her children and failing all along the way.

Sentimental value

The Pokemon book series- It was the first series I read starting in kindergarten. I read over twenty of them

The first Harry Potter- It was the first long book I read.

Animal Farm- It was the first book i read in school that I liked. It also brought history actually into English for me.

Lord of the Flies- It's just one of my favorite books. I can't explain why.

Harry Potter 5- I read it in a day at camp by borrowing other peoples books when they weren't using them.

The Silmarillion- It gave me a whole different view of Middle Earth and the Lord of the Rings.

The Lord of the Rings- It was the first series I read at the same time as my dad.

The Last of the Really Great Wangdoodles- I loved it as a kid.

The Count of Monte Cristo- Second chances.

David Eddings books in general- Fiction I got really into with my dad

The Pocket Guide to the Sky and the Stars- It was a not-so-small gift from my uncle that got me fascinated with the stars.

The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy- It was just fun to read in general.

The Catcher in the Rye- It is the most over-rated book ever. I didn't really like it at all.

Beauty's gone

What would you do to be forever young? To be forever youthful and beautiful while still managing to accumulate the wisdom and confidence developed over time is of course the dream of most humans, particularly Americans. Oscar Wilde's novel The Picture of Dorian Gray showed me this dream, and many of the horrors that could come with it. Ultimately, beauty is held by most in the novel to be above all else. Beauty in all forms is seen as the most important thing. In today's society, making people look "good" is a billion-dollar industry, yet we do not appreciate it in the same way as they. For both, beauty is all about outward appearance. We however, have become far less infatuated with the way true beauty makes one feel. Since there is such a large market to make people look young and beautiful even when they are not, the frequency of seeing something marked gorgeous or sexy or stunning has increased. We have lost sight of the fact that true beauty in any sense is rare. In the beginning of the novel, Basil's painting has the ability to change Lord Henry's mood. Much as Mr. Gray lost his soul to be youthful and beautiful, we have lost our ability to appreciate true, unadulterated beauty. Now, i am not saying that I see things as they really are or anything like that, but even the superficial beauty in The Picture of Dorian Gray was recognized as beauty and the perfection even awwed some of the characters. Today, products and outfits and knowing the right people can make you "beautiful". Yet, as more and more people become "beautiful" the word starts to lose its meaning. To combat this ever-growing lack of appreciation and lack of importance put on the word, others, like those i mentioned before, have become synonymous with beautiful and made it even less reputable of a word. All im saying, is would Mr. Wilde have called Mr. Gray hott? or sexy? or any of those other new-age words that are synonymous to but aren't beautiful? 

I also managed to read Sue Monk Kidd's The Secret Life of Bees, and actually managed to enjoy it. Most people I talked to about the book said I wouldn't like it because it is a "chick book". After reading it I definitely get where they are coming from, yet i think it is a book that has a lot more to offer than just being a "chick book". First, I learned a surprising amount about bees. But it was also a well written book, and the struggle with her father can be related to, to a lesser extent usually, by quite a few children. 

Crime and Punishment is a long book and it can be a boring drawn out book. There were times when I would read 5 pages and then go to sleep. But there were also times when i read for hours and didn't even notice, so in the end I'd say I'm glad I read it but I'm not sure I would do it again.

I read Pride and Prejudice mid summer. For the first time I can remember, I didn't save the assigned book for last. However, I remember the book surprisingly well. The different types of love and the different stories of hidden love and deceit were actually entertaining, and the class struggle and social issues that arose throughout the book only added. 

I don't usually read as much over the summer as I do at home. Primarily because I work at a summer camp with little kids, but this summer I found myself actually making time to read.